Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs.
~William Shakespeare
Dear readers of mine;
I just received this by email and the writer would like to know your opinions about her problem. Kindly share your thoughts and help ease the pain of Lovesick:
Hi!
I am an avid follower of your blog and I really like your style. Even though, of course, I can't always understand all the Arabic, it's been a great tool in helping me learn the language - well, and classes and cd's, blah blah blah :P
I'm writing because, like I said before, I'm American. I live and work in Kuwait and have for the past 18 months. I love the country, the culture, the learning (about the country and myself) and the travel that I've been doing since I arrived. Anyway, the gist of my problem is this: I met (by chance and I was totally not looking for it) and later fell in love with a Kuwaiti guy.... a wonderful, honest guy who also fell in love with me. To the extent that I would choose to make the rest of my life here, with him, and would be happy and lucky to do so.
We dated for several months and he went to his parents to discuss marriage - a big no. They wouldn't accept it, they would never accept me because of my nationality. Not religon, surprisingly, but because they rejected the idea of an American in their family. I am knowledgeable about the culture and traditions, and I know that this is not unusual thinking here, and that where I'm from is altogether different - I respect this. But, I have never been in love before this, and I've never been so devastated. I'm not young (mid 20's) and I'm not usually naive, but I truly thought that any parent would want their child to be happy... even if it is not ideal. That maybe in time they would come to be.... not thrilled, but ok, with it.
Neither of us (him or me) would marry without their knowledge and at least acceptance, not even an option. His love and respect for his family is one of his most attractive qualities.
I guess what I'm looking for is advice. I need rationale, any explanation, any advice - anything to help me move on and come to terms with this loss. So I thought I would appeal to your mass audience and get a more Kuwaiti-esque opinion. Is it really so horrifying a thought that I (an educated, well-traveled, caring girl, who happens to be American) be a part of a Kuwaiti family? My family is not thrilled at the thought of my life being in Kuwait, but they will do anything for me to be happy. They would visit and be supportive.
Very much appreciate your help!
Lovesick
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